The NachoTron 3000 is a seamless fusion of science, sport and nachos. Fueled by Mission's authentic Border Showdown tortilla chips, the NT3000 enables sports fans to compete for their favorite team in a test of football-throwing accuracy, with pride and cheese-covered snacks on the line.
WITNESS HISTORY, EAT FREE NACHOS. THIS MARVEL OF MODERN SCIENCE WILL BE UNVEILED ON NOVEMBER 26, 2011 AT THE BORDER SHOWDOWN, LOT M BETWEEN ARROWHEAD AND KAUFFMAN STADIUMS.
A unique and rather in-depth examination of the mathematical and geographic origins of the NachoTron 3000.
Some years ago, unbeknownst to the general public, we assembled a team of the greatest minds in the world. Physicists. Engineers. Mathematicians. This awesome assemblage of brainpower could have been used to solve the world's energy crisis, to create world peace or even to discover new solar systems. Instead, we used it for nachos.
The critical role of authentic tortilla chips in the study and advancement of technology, especially as it relates to interactive, competitive nacho-making machines.
Doctors Schwartz (left) and Cunningham (right). Pioneers of nacho-infused baby foods.
The Bearcats practice in the northeast quadrant of the NachoTron 3000. Research from this scrimmage lead scientists to conclude that football and nachos are mathematically compatible. Offensive line coach Randy Yetman not pictured.
There is no "I" in "Nachos".
Control room No. 52 inside the NachoTron 3000 (location withheld).
Dr. Edward Leonard (b. 1947 )
Dr. Leonard's cat, Moonshadow (pictured).
The NachoTron 2500, an early prototype, initially yielded a perfect queso-to-tortilla chip ratio but later experienced technical difficulties and completely melted down. Though the reason for said nacho meltdown is still widely disputed, more than a few scientists and snacking experts blame Dr. Ed Leonard's algorithm. One of the doctor's former colleagues, who wishes to remain anonymous, insists that Dr. Leonard forgot to carry the two very early in his calculations. Though the switchboard was salvaged in the wreckage, the rest of NT 2500 couldn't be saved.
A helmet inside a helmet.
Clearly, Mission Laboratories wrote the book on nacho-spewing super computers. But they're not done yet. Who knows what the future holds? Nachos beamed directly to your mouth? Computer-simulated nacho chips? Hot tub-friendly nachos? The possibilities are endless.
Editor's Note: Mission Laboratories really did write the book on nacho-spewing super computers, aptly titled The Book on Nacho-Spewing Supercomputers.*
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